titles are important. and worth the wait :)

well, this has definitely been a long time coming.

when blogging first became popular, I was pretty much totally opposed to it - I mean, an online journal for everyone to see? whats that about?

but, here I am...not too many years later, mind you, and am beginning one myself. Father has been using truths that I believe like....

1. remembering the great things that He has done in our lives as a way to praise Him for His faithfulness, 

2. the importance of community and of sharing life together, 

3. that community really can be shared electronically, and even though its not ideal, it must happen because He made us to connect and grow together, no matter how close or far the distance

....Hes been using these truths to open up my heart in a new way and even though its a little weird to post my heart online, I'm excited to share life and more than that, I'm grateful for how He brings change.

so, now: explanations.

my good friends who have been pestering me for just about a year now to get this thing started know that my issue all along was what to name it....yeah, yeah....I truly do know that its not a huge deal and its all about the content - the stories, the pictures, the connecting

but needless to say, to me its important

thought about all kinds of things, concepts, ideas that mean a lot to me - redemption, hebrews 6, isaiah 62, psalm 126, my heart songs, on and on and on

but, there were two ideas that I just couldn't shake....

chronicles. and the jordan river.

a few summers ago I studied 1 and 2 Chronicles. to be honest, I wasn't terribly excited about studying them...but I mean, its the word of God and its all important so thought I should press on. Don't know what it was really...something about the title that seemed stuffy and old and full of boring stuff

but, whoa, was I wrong. Father took me on a ride of faith and encouragement reading story after story of Him showing up in power and mercy and more than anything else, with His everlasting covenant of faithfulness. I was floored in reading about David, Solomon, the temple, Jehoshaphat, Josiah, and most of all, God's love for His people Israel.

But also, my heart clued in to the beauty of a chronicle - a record, stories, narratives, history written to be remembered and reflected upon, and above all, a reminder that we must never forget what He has brought us through and done in our lives. Chronicles are specific and personal and they show His unimaginable creativity in how He works in our lives. They show that He really does know what Hes doing and that, turns out, He is faithful. He is sovereign. and He is so good. When we remember, its humbling because all of a sudden, it becomes so clear that it is only by His grace that we can make it through or accomplish anything.

could keep going, but all this to say, I want to be someone who remembers. who encourages others to remember. who shares chronicles of His faithfulness. who says with my life and with my words that, it is all for Your glory Jesus.

the first time I really remember studying the Jordan River was through a book called Believing God. the section of the book that talked about Joshua 4 & 5 gripped my heart with such meaning and intensity, that even to this day, it has not loosened its hold. I can't go a few days without thinking about it or seeing my life somehow symbolically within the banks of the Jordan.

you need to read it for yourself if you haven't or if its been awhile, but it gets to me so much because I can see our lives in it...I can see my life in it. 

I can so easily identify with the Israelites and what they were feeling. I mean, God had made a promise to His people Israel that He would bring them into Canaan, their promised land... 

but, they had been in bondage in Egypt for hundreds of years. and He brought them out. then they were in the wilderness for 40 years because of their disobedience to Him. and yet He brought them out of that.

and now, they are at the banks of the Jordan. The only thing separating them from their promised land is this river which He miraculously parts at the very moment that the priests step into the water (sidenote: is that not amazing? He wants us to walk in trust of Him and when we step forward in dependence, that very moment, He breaks down the barrier that has been keeping us from the place of abundance and blessing that He has planned for us! phew, I could just stop there! His word is brilliant and so life-giving)

to keep going, 

I can just imagine myself being in this herd of people walking forward. I would probably end up being somewhere towards the middle of the line because lets face it, we could be attacked by enemies from the front or the back. Can imagine walking and finally making it to the shoreline. People are walking ahead which is an encouragement but as I go further into the river, it gets deeper and deeper, a little steep, and maybe a little dark. I would have to stop for a minute to process whats going down in my heart.

I realize that I'm scared. I knew what Egypt was like - hard labor and slave-drivers and bondage but at least I knew what to expect. I knew what the wilderness was like - wandering, bitterness, disobedience, frustrations, fear...but hey, even that, can seem familiar after awhile. but this road ahead is utterly terrifying. this is the thing that God has promised our people for generations and now its here. And all I can seem to think is I want to turn and run as fast as I can back to what I know. Yeah, I may not be in the abundance and clear provision of God, but I'll survive...I'll make it.

but,

then I remember. I remember that He has come through on every single promise that He has ever given us. I remember the stories mom and dad told me about Noah and that humongous boat and how Elohim (Lord God) preserved His people, and Abraham dreading the top of the mountain but Jehovah Jireh (Lord who provides) providing a lamb instead, of Joseph and how when everything seemed hopeless, Jehovah Gmolah (Lord who brings restitution) rose him to a place of power and influence in order to be used to save His people....those stories weren't just made up. I remember how my parents and grandparents spoke of these people with tears in their eyes at the great love of God. I know that He is real. I know He is true.

I saw with my own eyes the plagues of Egypt as a small child, the pillars of fire and clouds, the Red Sea. I saw Moses come down the mountain with the very law and words of God. I saw manna come from heaven to meet our needs even when we were so unbelieving. truly everything has seemed against us but Jehovah has brought us through every single time. He has proven His faithfulness over and over again.

so after my time of processing and remembering, I make a decision in my heart. I am going to trust Him. I am going to walk forward. Not because the people around me are going but because I have realized that He can be trusted, that He will not let me personally or us communally down. I'm going to face whatever is ahead in this unknown Canaan with faith and perspective.

whoa. think its time to digress. :)

we can all connect with this. Being faced with decisions to believe Him and trust His character and His promises, in spite of our current situations. and then when we decide in our hearts to trust....bam! welcome to the promised land! welcome to the God-given and God-promised place of freedom and abundance and intimacy with Him!

and, thats not even all of the story yet!

when all the people made it through the river, God told Joshua to take up 12 stones out of the Jordan and to stand them up as a memorial....

"in the future when your descendants ask their fathers, 'what do these stones mean?' tell them, 'Israel crossed over on dry ground.' He did this so that all the peoples of the earth might know that the hand of the Lord is powerful, and so that you might always fear the Lord your God."

joshua 4:21-24

hence, stones of remembrance - the events of our lives that Father has brought us through that show that His hand is powerful, that He has always been at work, that He has a beautiful plan and that it might involve pain but it will always involve His presence, His love, and His healing.

so, can't shake these things. and pray that I never will.

also, can't promise all posts will be this long or deep but hey, 

titles really are important :)

thanks for joining in on this journey with me!

p.s. if you don't know what your specific 'stones of remembrance' are, you should take some time to remember and praise Him!